Do you ever compare yourself to others? Do you take note of others’ success and wish it were your own? Despite your attempts to not compare, do you still find yourself looking to measure up to something or someone else?

Perhaps that’s not you. Perhaps you do not compare yourself to others. Maybe you’re the type who compares yourself to yourself. Sounds crazy, right? I had a client recently who stated, ‘Ugh, when I was in college I was ten pounds lighter.’ She said it with a sigh and a frown on her face. Instead of choosing to be inspired by something her body is obviously capable of accomplishing, she chose the more resistant approach of comparison.

Whether you find yourself comparing yourself to your friends, family members, colleagues, strangers, or outdated/projected versions of how you once were or how you could/should be, the root of comparison lies in fear. When we operate from a fear state, we automatically isolate ourselves. We become contracted, and this separate way of thinking can contribute to debilitating mental and physical conditions. My acronym for the word FEAR is: Freedom Ends, Aloneness Rises. When we move from fear, we are forgetting our innate freedom and joy and isolating ourselves from the rest of the world. When we separate ourselves, growth is not possible. We will always feel stuck. We will feel lonely.

I am utterly curious as to what happened to humanity that forces many of us to resort to comparing ourselves instead of viewing something great and becoming inspired and empowered. If your ex boyfriend is now dating a new beautiful girl, why does your response have to be all about you and how you compare to her? Why isn’t the default setting on feeling encouraged by their new connection and wishing happiness for them both? Or let’s say your good friend runs his or her own successful business and happens to drive a really nice car. Instead of comparing yourself in terms of what this person has versus what you don’t, why not feel empowered and motivated by your friend’s passion for hard work and know that is a possibility for yourself as well?

The truth is, when we fall into the trap of comparison, we are not so much interested in what others have, whether it be the better body, the better lover, the bigger bank account, etc. No. It’s none of these. Comparison is rooted in a deep subconscious understanding that we are capable of creating miracles. When we choose to compare and move from fear, we are forgetting this core foundation. We are forgetting that comparison is a signal that whatever it is we are envious of is actually a part of ourselves. It is not the actual ‘thing’ we are after but the ‘feeling’ associated with it. Do you want love? Abundance? Success? Peace of mind?

Use your external world and all situations as inspiration to discover your true purpose and potential in this life. The power lies within in you. It lies in your choosing to move from a place of love instead of doubt. When we choose to feel inspired by others and ourselves, we are quite literally looking at the world through brand new eyes. Life opens up. Joy arises. There is only upward movement. You can only go forward. When you compare, you remain the victim. When you become inspired, you open up the gateway for miracles to present themselves. You now have full responsibility for your actions and what it is you choose to create. Please know your potential for wellbeing is infinite. Limitless. Stop playing it small. What do you have to lose?

Comparison: it’s a conspiracy. Don’t fall into the trap. Transform it in the moment when it tries to creep up. Compar-inspiration. Two sides of the same coin. You choose.

Shayna Hiller

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